Jamar Hornsby Watch

http://www.espn.com/college-football/news/story?id=3388268

A little background information on this coveted award.

Also I was asked what the Liberace was by a member of the group, if you can believe it. I was stunned.

Read it and weep, My Friends.

The too long neglected Jamar Hornsby Award is back in full play this year.

Thus far we have the following candidates:

Art Briles, for throwing Baylor rape victims under the bus.
Kenneth Starr for 1) being Kenneth Starr and 2) saying Art Briles' shit is okay
The USC player who stomped on the Alabama player's nut sack after a special teams play.
Greg Schiano, TOSU co-defensive coord for plowing a TOSU bicylist with his car because when you're Greg Schiano you don't stop for red lights in Columbus, Ohio.

Feel free to suggest your own Jamar Hornsby winner in the comment section.
This year's Jamar Hornsby winner will receive a thoughtfully worded official notification from the BRFL front office. Signed by the Commissioner for Life!

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 5: Three Alarm Guru

GG Week 5:

Stanford (#7) @ Washington U (10) Friday night game. PAC-12 Ball Buster.

Wisconsin (8) @ Meechy (4). Let's see who's for real in the B1G.

Louisville (3) @ Clemson (5). SeaBass @ McLuvin'. It's a 3 handkerchief afternoon for someone.

Roll the bones, BRFLers.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

BRFL Week 4: Double Diddle

Starting to get a feel for where this BRFL season is going after week 4.

Seannie riding top side. Louisville delivers a 59-28 pasting to Marshall. He's still Numero Uno. Louisville #3 in the AP.
So playoffs.

Miami had a bye. Still Randilingus moved up one and got a no drop. #14.

Ohio State with the bye week. Q gathers a no drop. She's got the AP #2 team. TOSU.

Meechy shat upon Penn State. Justice served. 49-10 for the Maize and Blue. Teebs! touching himself. And why not? He has the inside track on the Liberace. Still #4 in the AP.

Wash U survives in the desert. 35-28 over unranked Arizona. AP punishes. Drop 1. AP Numba Ten suckee long time, CCS.

Hot diggety damn. BroFro gets the DIDDLE and lands at #24 in the AP. 38-24 over Oregon State. Nets 7 on the weekend. Crazy like a fox, is this bitch.

KMan's Gators implode. Comeback victims to the Vols, 38-28. Suicide always an option. Minus 4 on the day. Gators holding on to the 23rd spot in the AP. Flirting with REAMland.

SockPuppet starting to see some chance of recovery. Tennessee not sucking against Florida, big first step. 5 point weekend. Tennessee #11.

Clemson shuts down GTech, 26-7. McLuvin'picks up a couple. Still #5 in the land and thinking playoffs. Louisville must stumble.

SkHanks dreams of glory running off the rails. Oregon upset by Colorado 41-38. Buffs make it tough for the Skankmeister to stay positive. Cutting behavior expected. Unranked.

Florida State hangs 55 on South Florida. But gives up 35. To South Florida. AP gives you a move up for that shit, Snottie? 3 point weekend.

DIDDLE! DIDDLE! DIDDLE! TCU pounds the Ponies of SMU  33-3. AP moves me up to #21, Awesome 10 point weekend, Mr. Awesome. It's "Me Time" all the time, Bitches.

Iowa outlast Rutgers 14-7. One point. Unranked. DPo in the Land of Boredom and Corn.

Ugh. Duke over Notre Dame 38-35. Domers Defensive Coordinator the only one to get a sack. Shit canned. And Brian Kelly starts thinking maybe coaching the pros doesn't look so bad. Clem locked in horrible depressive tail spin. Seldom changes clothes, ignores personal hygiene. Obsessive masturbation.

It's a touchdown. Wait. No it isn't. Auburn 18 over LSU 13. Euphoria on the Plains. Les Miles fired. Addle brained SEC fan sets fire to Toomer's Corners trees. What is it with the fucking trees? Bridget seen talking to police on local bridge. Hard to hear what she was saying in between inhuman screams. Minus 7 power dive and then a gratuitous REAMing by the AP. Unranked and in the death spiral.
2 years in a row the Killer Bee has had her coach shot out from under her.

The Leader Board:

SeaScum: 24 BRFL points

Randong: 22

Teebs!: 11

Q: 11

CCS: 10

BroFro: 9

KMan: 6

SockPuppet: 5

McLuvin": 0

Skank: Negative 2

Snottie: -4

'BoSuke: -5

Dpo: -8

ClemboSlice: -18

Killer B: -22

Jimbosuke,

Commissioner for Life

GG Week 4 Results: Dawn of the Vols

Georgia mauled by Ole Miss, 45-14.
Florida overtaken by The Vols 38-28. History is made.
Texas A&M fries the Pigs, 45-24. Nibble on that, Bert Bielema.

3 sweeps: DPo, CCS, BroFro. 5 each.

New leaders, new standings.

CCS 10.
DPo 10.
BroFro 10.
SeaGra 9. (Georgia, Sean? Really?)
Teebs! 8.
Killer B 7.
KMan 7. (The first cut  is the deepest, Bitch.)
McLuvin' 7.
Randong Long Time 7.

Snottie 6.
Sock Puppet 5.

Jimbosuke 3.

GG is a suck ass stupid game. Who came up with this boner?

'BoSuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 4: SECmania

GG Week 4: All SEC, All The Time:

Georgia (#12) @ Ole Miss (#23)
Georgia is 3-0, Ole Miss is 1-2. Can the Dawgs keep it going in Oxford?

Florida (#19) @ Tennessee (#14).
A must win game for the Vols in Knoxville.

Arkansas (#17) @ Texas A&M (#10)
Arlington, TX. SOOOEEEE piggy.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Week 3 BRFL Results: Triple Ream

Only week 3 and a major shake-up.
It was only a few weeks ago Snottie was blowing smoke out his blow hole about FSU and the Nat'l Championship. Now...not so much.
Clem returns to Skid Row.
And I guess this year we won't have to worry about forking over money to SkHank.

Louisville dismantles Florida State 63 to 20. Total of 9 points for Seannie G., total of minus 11 for Snottie who power dives to #13 in the AP. It's Louisville that's looking at the Final Four now, Bitch.

MEN OF THE SCARLET AND GRAY. Opening a can of Whoop-Ass on Bob Stoops in Oklahoma with a 45-24 spanking that wasn't as close as the score looks. Q gets a boost. 3 points. #2 team in the country.

Meechy 45, Colorado Buffaloes 28. 2 pointer for Teebs. Meechy #4 and thinking playoffs.

Clemson returns to form, ass-whips hapless SowCow 59-0. 2 points for McLuvin' this week. Lands him at minus 2 for the season.

Wash U hangs 41 on...Portland State? The Almighty AP is angered. 0 on the weekend. (He won, but he went backwards and doesn't get a no drop point). CCS backpedals to #9.

Meechy State blows out Notre Dame's candle 36-28 in South Bend. This infuriates the AP and they bend ClemboSlice over a log and give him the REAM. Minus 12 on the weekend. No playoff fo you, G.I.

North Dakota State lays a loss on Iowa. They had it coming. Kirk Ferentz says, "Fuck you. I already got a raise and a contract extension. People in Iowa don't get that I suck." But the AP does. Oh, yes. They drag Kirk behind the silo, lay him over the manure spreader and give him the REAM. An epic minus 17 weekend for DPo. Easy schedule my ass. Iowa unranked.

Tennessee survives against perennial power house Ohio U. and the AP inexplicably gives them a move up for this bullshit. 3 point weekend for Sock. Tennessee at #14

LSU "dominates" Mississippi State 23-20 and the AP says, "Sure, take 2." Killer Bee nets 4 on the weekend. Crazy Les Miles sits at #18 with his squad.

Oregon douches out and takes a loss vs. unranked Nebraska, 35-32. A vengeful AP grabs a stray corn cob and drills a REAM into SkHank and the Ducks. Minus 8 weekend, courtesy of the Cornhuskers.
Oregon is unranked.

Florida pisses all over nobody North Texas, 32-0. AP loves it as the Gators move up 4. 6 point weekend for KMan. Florida is #19.

Holy shit. Miami 45 over App State 14. AP goes ape-shit and boosts them 10 (I know, I know, I don't get it either) and Randingle crushes the weekend with 12 points. Miami is #15.

TCU beats Iowa State 41-20. Less than impressive. No love from the AP. Commissioner gets 1 point. Still unranked.

Boise State had a bye. Unranked. BroFro gets stoogatz. Stays at 2 total.

How it stands:

SeaBalls: Louisville #3. 22 BRFL points.
Randilingus: Miami #15, 20.
CCS: Washington U #9, 10. Three way tie for the Liberace.
Q Woman: THE Ohio State University #2. 10.
KMan: Florida Gators #19, 10.
Teebs: Meechy #4. 9.
BroFro: Boise State Unranked: 2
SackPuppet: Tennessee #14: 0
SkHank: Oregon Unranked. minus 2.
McLuvin': Clemson. #5, -2.
Snottie: Florida State U #13, -7.
DPo: Iowa Unranked. -9.
Killer Bee: LSU #18, -10
'BoSuke: TCU Unranked. -15
ClemboSlice: Notre Dame: Unranked. -18

The AP is a nasty mistress.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 3 Results

And we have our first Sweep. Seannie G. Who else? 5 points.

Randude: 2

Bosuke: 1

BroFro: 1

CCS: 2

McLuvin: 2

Killer Bee 2

KMan 2

DPo 1

Teebs 2

ScoDouche 1

Sock Puppet 1

The Leader Board:

SeaGra: 7

Randong: 6

Teebs!: 6

Killer Bee: 5

KMan: 5

McLuvin': 5

CCS: 5

DPo: 5

Snottie: 5

BroFro: 5

SockPuppet: 3

'BoSuke: 2

Jimbosuke,

Commissioner for Life

GG week 3: Now it gets Real.

GG Week 3;

Here's a picture of your Commissioner breaking rocks in the hot sun on a desert island in the Caribbean, March, 2016. This is the closest I come to having fun.

Meechy State (#12) @ Notre Dame (#18). To say this is a "must win" game for ClemboSlice is a major understatement.

THE Ohio State University (#3) @ Oklahoma (#14). At the start of the season Oklahoma was the favorite. Now...not so much. Men of the Scarlet and Gray! Q builds major momentum with a win this weekend. QWoman you can read this article and be reassured or deeply disturbed.

Florida State U (#2) @ Louisville (#10). Clash of BRFL Titans. Snottie with the Semen Holes and SeaScum with the Cardinals. I look forward to major shit-talk.

Roll the bones, Bitcheremos.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

BRFL Week 2 Results

When the Commissioner has a bad weekend, everyone has a bad weekend.
Never forget that.

Louisville 62 - Syracuse 28. Seannie with 5 on the weekend. 13 for SeaBalls.

Wash U 59 - Idaho 14. CCS picks up 3. 11 total for CCS.

Miami 38 - Fla Atlantic 10. 2 for Randude. 8 for the Randsicle on the season

Iowa 42 -Iowa State 3 for the CyHawk Trophy. 5 for DPo. 8 for  Dpo, season total.

THE Ohio State University 48 - Tulsa Golden Hurricanes 3. 3 for Q. 7 on the season.

Meechy 51 - UCF 14. 3 for Teebs! 7 on the season.

Oregon 44 - Virginia 26. 4 for SkHank. 6 on the season.

Florida 45 over Kentucky 7. DIDDLE! for the KMan. Last week the Ream. 1 for the win, 2 for the  move up, 5 for the Diddle. 8 point weekend. Started at minus 4, plus 4 and back from the dead, KMan.

Fla. State 45 over Charleston Southern 8. 3 for Snottie. 4 on the season for Snottie.

Boise slides by Wash. St. 31-28. 1 for BroFro. 2 season long for Bro.

Tennessee 45 over VTech 24. Anxious moments. 4 for SockPuppet. Minus 3 on the season.

Clemson 30 over Troy 24. Trouble for McLuvin'. minus 2 on the weekend. Minus 4 season wide.

Notre Dame 39 over Nevada 10. 2 points for Clembosuke. Minus 6 on the year.

LSU 34 over Jacksonville State 13. New QB. 3 points for the Killer Bee. Minus 14 on the season.

Everyone knows of the legendary, deeply held personal animus the Commissioner holds for Bert Bielema. Imagine the despair. Imagine the butt-hurt.
Arkansas 41 over TCU 38 in double OT. TCU with serious problems in the kicking game. Drops from #15 (includes a REAM) out of the poll. That's a minus 15 weekend. That's, like, really bad.
Minus 16 on the year for the Commish.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

GG Week 2 Results

GG Week 2:

This is such bullshit.

Arkansas Chancres over TCU 41-38 double OT. Fuck. You. All.
Utah edges BYU in the "Holy War" 20-19.
Miss State douches SowCow 27-14. Puke-a-zoid.

'BoSuke : 0
SeaGra: 1
BroFro: 2
Teebs!: 2
CCS: 1
DPo: 2
KMan: 1
McLuvin': 2
Snottie; 2
Sock: 0
Killer: 2
Randude: 2

Season:

BroFro: 4
DPo: 4
Snottie: 4
Randong: 4
Teebs!: 4
CCS: 3
Killer: 3
McLuvin'; 3
Sock Puppet: 2
KMan: 3
SeaScum: 2
'BoSuke: 1

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

BRFL Week 1 Standings

Week 1 Standings:

SAG and CCS: 8
Randude: 6
Teebs! and Q: 4
DPo: 3
SkHank: 2
BroFro and Snottie: 1
'BoSuke: -1
McLovin': -2
KMan: -4
Sock: -7
ClemboSlice: -8
Killer Bee: -17

JimboSuke
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 2

GG Week 2:

Arkansas @ TCU (#15)

BYU @ Utah

So. Carolina @ Mississippi State.

1 for each win. 5 for the sweep.

Roll the bones, my friends.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG week 1 Results

GG Week 1.
Not an impressive start.
No sweeps.
Everyone got burned on the Oklahoma v Houston game. Will see if Houston holds up this year. But this was an impressive win. Unless, of course, Oklahoma sucks.

Houston 33 over Oklahoma 23
Georgia over North Carolina. Nick Chubb 222 yds rushing and 2 TDs
FSU over Ole Miss. Everyone picked FSU.

Randy 2
CCS 2
BroFro 2
KMan 2
DPo 2
Teebs! 2
Snott 2
Sock 2
SeaGra 1
McLovin' 1
Killer Bee 1
'BoSuke 1

Onward.

Jimbosuke
Commissioner for Life

Week 1 BRFL Results: Crazy Les Miles Craters

Louisville blows out Charlotte, 70-14.  AP poll shows love. A 6 point rise in the poll. Plus the win and the no drop point. Add 8. Now at # 13 in the AP. Big smiley face for SeaGra.

Tennessee survives App State 20 -13. Tennessee had their best defender ejected for targeting.
Tennessee was taken out behind the woodshed by the AP Pollsters. They got the switch put cross they ass. Dropped 8 places. Minus 7 is SockPuppet's score. #17 in the AP.

Hawaii @ Meechy: Meechy 63 over Hawaii 3. At least Hawaii has the weather. Meechy has a nasty defense. Hawaii devoured and never even in this game. Meechy earns 2 point move up. 1 for the win. 1 for the no drop. BRFL score is 4, AP rank is #5. Does this mean Teebs! is back and ready for a championship run? Doubtful.

Bowlin' Green @ TOSU: TOSU 77 over Bowlin' Green 10. Total. Beat. Down.Q has herself a pick here. AP shows deep, soulful love. Move up 2. 1 for the win. 1 for the no drop. 4 point weekend. #4 team in the land. Lovin' you some TJ Barrett.

Rutgers @ Washington: Washington 48 over Buttgers 13. Huskies bitch slap a not very good team with a brand new coach. AP achieves and sustains massive erection and bumps them up 6 spots. With the win point and the no drop it's an 8 pointer for Chippendale. #8 team in the country.

Miami of Ohio @ Iowa: Iowa 45 over Miami of Ohio 31. Giving up 21  to Miami of Ohio? No matter. The AP, with there habitual knee jerk jeans-cream over Iowa, gives them a moveup. Add a win and a no drop, that's a three point weekend for doing absolutely nothing. DPo giggles without shame.

LSU vs. Wisconsin @ Lambeau Field in Green Bay. Wisco 16 over LSU 14. Upset time. WTF, Les Miles? Maybe hire a quarterbacks coach? Everybody else has one. Killer Bee, you have a problem. Unfortunately he is taking the snaps for LSU. The AP hates on you. Hard. You power dive 16 spots in the AP Poll. Considering you started at minus 1 you sit now, lonely and bereft, at minus 17. Something needs to get fixed. Pronto.

UC Davis @ Oregon: Oregon 39 over UC Davis 14. So far so good, SkHank. Started at #24, remain at #24. 2 point weekend.

U Mass @ Florida (Gators): Gators 24 over UMass 7. Gators have an offense, KMan? Not enough for the AP who gores your ass with a drop out of the Top 25. A historic debacle by BRFL standards. I don't think I ever remember a new member taking the dreaded REAM on their very first game. You stand at minus 4, unranked, in a world of hurt. Joining the BRFL looking like a "questionable decision."

South Dakota State @ TCU: TCU 59 (good) over South Dakota State 41 (bad). Bad because TCU is a defense minded team. and SDSU is, well, SDSU. Punishing blow by the AP. Drops me 2. Get a point for the win. I stand unbroken and unbowed at minus 1. Fucking Gary Patterson, figure this shit out. TCU ranked #15,

Clemson @ Auburn: Clemson 19 over The Plainsman 13. Okay, here's some typical AP bullshit. Clemson, supposed to be the #2 team in the country, survives a game against unranked Auburn who was, as recently as last year, practically an SEC punching bag. You'd expect Dabo's Dildos to drop a little but you'd be wrong because the AP has a permanent boner for Clemson. They stay at #2, They get 2 BRFL points for that shit. Since McLovin' started at minus 4 he is now minus 2. Good luck living with yourself, McFoofer.

Boise St vs Louisiana Lafayette: Broncos 45, Rajun Cajuns 10. Meh. Smurf ball not ready for prime time yet, BroFro. Play somebody, then we'll talk. You have one god damn BRFL point. Still unranked, Douchenozzle.

Miami (Fla) vs Florida A&M: Hurricanes 70, A&M 3. Total destruction. Randude, flying under the radar. Okay, it's Florida A&M. But it got him a win and it got him a DIDDLE right out of the gate. 6 point weekend for the mountain man way out west in Montana. Treat yourself to an extra piece of pemmican, Hillbilly.

Notre Dame @ Texas: Texas 50, Notre Dame 47 in double OT. Hell of a game. Total bullshit missed call by the refs on the targeting of Tory Hunter, Jr. If this game had been played in South Bend there is no way that head shot would have not drawn a flag and ejection. As it is the Texas Shithorns get the win. Enjoy that carry off the field shit, Charley Strong. It's the last time it will happen this season. Notre Dame has found their quarterback. Still love the pick. AP showers hate on the Domers. Drop them 8 spots. Clem at minus 8, ranked#18

Ole Miss @ Florida State. Rebs 34, FSU 45. Amazing comeback. Jimbo Fisher knows how to adjust. He's a total asshole as well. I would have given them stugats for their performance. AP moves them up one. 3 point weekend for the Tools from Tallahasee. Started at minus 2, you're plus 1 in the BRFL, Scott. Hating.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Week 1 Tilts

Look closely at this picture. What is it? It's the decapitated head of a snapper hollowed out and set on top of an LED light to serve as a center piece while Your Truly ate the rest of him. Pretty nice, huh? This is how you have fun on tiny Caribbean islands.

The opening weekend is upon us, Brethren:

Louisville blows out Charlotte, 70-14

Tennessee survives App State 20 -13. Tennessee has had their best defender ejected for targeting.

All the rest of our games are on Saturday:

Hawaii @ Meechy: Meechy 63 over Hawaii 3 At least Hawaii has the weather.

Bowlin' Green @ TOSU: TOSU 77 over Bowlin' Green 10. Total. Beat. Down.

Rutgers @ Washington: Washington 48 over Buttgers 13

Miami of Ohio @ Iowa: Iowa 45 over Miami of Ohio 31. Giving up 21  to Miami of Ohio?

LSU vs. Wisconsin @ Lambeau Field in Green Bay. Wisco 16 over LSU 14. Upset time.

UC Davis @ Oregon: Oregon 39 over UCDavis 14. So far so good, SkHank.

U Mass @ Florida (Gators): Gators 24 over UMass 7. Gators have an offense, KMan?

South Dakota State @ TCU: TCU 59 (good) over South Dakota State 41 (bad).

\Clemson @ Auburn: Clemson 19 over The Plainsman 13. War Eagle.

Boise St vs Louisianna Lafayette: Broncos 45, Rajun Cajuns 10

Miami (Fla) vs Florida A&M: Hurricanes 70, A&M 3. Total destruction.

Notre Dame @ Texas: Texas 50, Notre Dame 47 in double OT. Hell of a game.

Ole Miss @ Florida State. Rebs 34, FSU 45. Amazing comeback.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life