GG Week 3 Games

Tasha Steelz, underground pro wrestler.

GG Week 3:

Still waiting for GG Week 2 results? Wait a little longer, DBags. I'm busy.

Week 3 games, all on Saturday:

#17 Boise State @ #24 Oklahoma State
Shoot out in Stillwater.
12:30, ESPN

#12 LSU @ #7 Auburn
Tiger on Tiger violence.
12:30, CBS

#4 Ohio State vs. #15 TCU
At JerryWorld, Dallas, Texas. And neutral site My Ass. Fuck you, Jerry Jones. Have I mentioned how much I hate naming rights?
8 PM, ABC

Roll the bones, Amigos,


Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 2: Upset Minded?

GG Week 2:

All Saturday games.

#3 Georgia @ #24 U. of South Carolina, 3:30 PM, CBS

#2 Clemson @ unranked Texas A&M, 7 PM, ESPN

#17 USC Trojans @ #10 Stanford, 8:30 PM, Fox

1 for the win, 5 for the sweep.

Roll the bones,

Jimbosuke,

Commissioner for Life

BRFL Week 1 Results

Randiddle; UCF (21) at UConn, 56-17 beat down. Booger picking moron may have nailed the pick of the year. Sad. Bad Guy, Moves up 2 to #19. Crushes the 4 point weekend.

KBronieManWoman: Wisconsin (4) hosts the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers and beats their asses 34 -3. Still. The Hilltoppers gave the big fucking galoots on the Badger O-line a ration of shit. Trouble?
AP says," 'chyeah! " and drops you one to #5. Even with the win, you tread water at Negative 2.

SeannieG: Utah State visits (11) Sparty in East Lansing and gives them a scare, losing 31-38. LJ Scott 23 carries for...84 yards? AP sure doesn't like it. Power dive to #15, minus 4 offset by one for the win. Negative three is your new home. #Enjoy.

SkHank: At home, Stanford (13 ) manages to get by the San Diego State Aztecs 31-10 and the fucking AP moves them up 3. Just what kind of BULLSHIT are we talking about here? Stanford at #10. 5 point weekend for SkHanky.

McLovin: Alabama (1) slaps the shit out of Louisville 51-14. Can't believe they gave up 14. Can't move up from #1. Congratulations, McTool. You are now at minus 3.

CCS: Clemson (2) 48, Furman 7. Furman. Fucking Furman. Challenging start for the Tiggers. Fast train to nowhere. One for the win. One for the no drop. Minus two total. Just really lame.

BroFro: The Ohio State University 77, Oregon State Beavs 31. Eleven touchdowns. Eleven. Questions abound on the defensive side of the ball. One for the win, one for the move up to #4, one for the no drop. The Bro already in the black with +2.

Bridgshit: Auburn (9) 21, Washington (6) 16. Honestly? I thought this was going to be a horrible ass kicking on you, KillerB. A veteran SEC team is not who you want to open with, neutral site or not. Why did none of us pick Auburn? Because we're stupid. That's why. AP rolls you down the hill minus 3 and that's where you start next week.

Timmy!: Michigan (14) 14, Notre Dame (12) 21. Costly ejection of Metellus. O-line is sieve-like. Defense not all it was cracked up to be but still, playing without Metellus. But an absolute crash down the AP greased poll of MINUS 7? Not expecting that. It was a road game against a more highly ranked team and they lost by a touchdown. Me no understand. Still, you are in pain. In fact, you are deep, deep shit. And if Jimmy Khaki's doesn't get his shit squared away that is where you'll stay.

SockPuppet: Mississippi State (18) 63, Stephen F. Austin 3. Oh for God's sakes. Stephen F. Austin. Probably because they got sick of the Lee Majors jokes. What does the "F" stand for? Fucking screwed because they get stomped by SEC schools for a living. I'm disgusted. One for the win. One for the no drop. 2. Is you. "Billy".

Q: Is the worm turning? Oregon (24) opens a can on Bowling Green, 58-24. One times 3. Crush the 3 pointer. This has, like, never happened on opening day for you before.

Kitten: A cock-whipping of Troy by Boise St, Broncos (22) 56-20 on the road. The AP likes it. 2 for the move to #20, one for the win, one for the no drop. 4 pointer. Nice.

Snottie: DIDDLE! DIDDLE! DIDDLE! Did someone say "pick of the year"? South Carolina 49, Coastal Caroline 15. And already a Diddle. And one for the win, sure. And 1 more for landing at #24 in the Almighty AP. Ring it up, Mr. Drucker, and it comes to 7. Snottie en fuego.

DPo: Bet you wish you were Snottie. You too went with the unranked team. But, like, that didn't work out so great because Arizona lost to BYU, 28-23. Do you have a thing for Rich Rod? That could be a problem. Zero. Still on the tarmac, Little Mr. Airplane.

Speaking of being in a world of shit, Jimbosuke: Florida State (19) man handled at home by Virginia Tech (20) 24-3. The AP is not kind. Florida State. New coach. New offense. New defense. Problem: None of them work. The O-line. OH MY FUCKING GOD! Deondre Francois is going to die if they don't fix the O-line. I am so on pace for the Pinkernell. REAMED. And hard. Minus Eleven. I would say I'm screwed.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 1 Results: Real Games, Real Losers.

GG Week One.

A rare glimpse inside BRFL World Headquarters, where The Magic happens. And you wonder how mistakes get made? You wonder how some bills go unpaid?

Auburn over Washington, 21 - 16.
Notre Dame downs Michigan, 24 - 17. I did not realize that you can now get ejected for hitting a receiver with your shoulder.
Virginia Tech dumps Florida State on the road, 24 - 3, Seminoles O-line has issues.

CCS: 2
BroFro: deuce
KBronie: double
McLovin: one
Jimbosuke: 1
SeannieG: 1
DPo: 1
Sock Puppet: 1
Randude: 2
Bridgshit: 1

Redshirts: Q, Timmy!, SkHank, Snottie, Kitten.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Ten reasons to hate...

The Oregon State Beavers. Coming off a 1-11 season and playing a mildly worked up Scarlet and Gray squad. Why hate the Beavers? Let elevenwarriors.com show you the way.
Good luck, BroFro.
Everybody else, your loss is my gain so lose, lose and lose again.
The real blockbuster this weekend is Michigan at Notre Dame. I'm betting on Timmy! for this one. This is hard to say but (God forgive me), Go Blue.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG Week 1 Games.

GG Week 1 is, well, totally awesome.

#6 Washington U (Bridgshit) vs #9 Auburn Tigers
neutral site, Mercedes-Benz Stadium, Atlanta, GA. 3:30 PM, ABC

#14 Michigan (Timmy!) @ #12 Notre Dame
Notre Dame Stadium, South Bend, Indiana, 7:30 PM, NBC

#20 Virginia Tech @ #19 Florida State U (Jimbosuke)
Doak Walker Stadium, Tallahasee, FL, 8 PM, ESPN

Do I have to say It?
Roll the bones.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Season Twelve Takes Off

And we're UNDERWAY with Season Twelve, Brothers and Sisters.

KBronieManWoman: #4 Wisconsin Badgers. Starts at minus 2. Bruce Pinkernell winner.
Timmy!: #14 Michigan Wolverines. Took home the Shame Penguin in '17. 
Q: #24 Oregon Ducks. 
CCS: #2 Clemson Tigers. Starts at minus 4.
Randog : #21 UCF Knights.
ClemboSlice : Taking a knee in 2018. Financial redshirt.
Bridgshit : #6 Washington Huskies.
SkHank: #13 Stanford Cardinal.
Kitten: #22 Boise State Broncos
Jimbosuke, aka Jimmy Lulu: #19 Florida State Seminoles
SeannieG: #11 Michigan State Spartans
SockPuppet: #18 Mississippi State
Snottie (coin toss with BroFro, you won): unranked South Carolina Gamecocks
BroFro : #5 THE Ohio State University Buckeyes. Posting up with the Liberace this year. Starts at minus one.
McLovin: #1 Alabama Crimson Tide. Start at minus 5.
DPo : unranked Arizona Wildcats. Last year's Champion of Champions. 


Let's get hatin'.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

TImmy! The Bold.

You're either a genius on the brink of your first BRFL championship or you're a three-alarm, certifiably insane nut job.
Thanks for keeping it real, TBro.

Jimbosuke
Commissioner for Life.

Free Urban Meyer

Well, that was a long run for a short slide.

Here's a heart felt "fuck you" to all the haters who couldn't tell their assholes from a hole in the ground.

I think we can handle TCU without the Urbinator. 

The right decision would have been "no suspension, immediate reinstatement". But the President of TOSU is a total pussy.

Go Bucks.

Ohio Against The World. 

Jimbosuke,

Commissioner for Life

BRFL 2018 Draft Order

Today is the day the AP Poll drops.

BRFL Season 12 Draft Order. Bitches.

KBronieManWoman: #4 Wisconsin Badgers. Starts at minus 2.
Timmy!: #14 Michigan Wolverines
Q: #24 Oregon Ducks
CCS: #2 Clemson Tigers
Randog : #21 UCF Knights
ClemboSlice ( Also: $ ) : Taking a knee in 2018.
BridgshitL on the clock : Bridgshit with #6 Washington Huskies.
SkHank: #13 Stanford Cardinal.
Kitten: #22 Boise State Broncos
Jimbosuke, aka Jimmy Lulu: #19 Florida State Seminoles
SeannieG: #11 Michigan State Spartans
SockPuppet: #18 Mississippi State
Snottie (coin toss with BroFro, you won): unranked South Carolina Gamecocks
BroFro : #5 THE Ohio State University Buckeyes. May you live forever and surf a river of beer and trout the whole time. OHIO AGAINST THE WORLD.
McLovin: #1 Alabama Crimson Tide. Are you fucking kidding me? The Commissioner in me sees a change to the Living Document coming down the tracks. Choo-choo, chugga, chugga, chugga, Bitches. Start at minus 5.
DPo : unranked Arizona Wildcats.

There are a bunch of no name games on 8/25. Even given the stupidity of some of our picks over the years I can't see anybody picking these teams. Though BroFro once went with Hawaii and did fairly well.
So...I'm thinking we have until 8/30 to git r dun.
Be ready when I call you. Don't dilly dally, Sally.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Gird Your Loins, Mouth Breathers. AP Poll a Comin'

The AP announced on Monday, July 23 that the preseason Top 25 will be released on Monday, August 20 at 12 p.m. EST.

Here’s the full Top 25:

1. Alabama (42)
2. Clemson (18)
3. Georgia
4. Wisconsin (1)
5. Ohio State
6. Washington
7. Oklahoma
8. Miami
9. Auburn
10. Penn State
11. Michigan State
12. Notre Dame
13. Stanford
14. Michigan
15. USC
16. TCU
17. West Virginia
18. Mississippi State
19. Florida State
20. Virginia Tech
21. UCF
22. Boise State
23. Texas
24. Oregon
25. LSU

RELATED

Challenging the conventional wisdom on each top-25 team

Other teams that received votes in the initial poll were South Carolina (96), Florida (68), Utah (60), Oklahoma St. (51), FAU (38), Arizona (28), NC State (22), Texas A&M (21), Boston College (18), Northwestern (13), Kansas St. (10), Iowa St. (8), Houston (6), Memphis (3), Troy (2), Iowa (2), Kentucky (1), Arkansas St. (1), Fresno St. (1).

Shit be gettin' crazy

It's been a crazy ride in Columbus the last few days. And it just keeps getting crazier.
This couple had some problems.
Check it out.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

"I'm Not Dead Yet."

Interesting.

D Po, have you noticed the silence? Every SEC turd and ex Jock talking head is all bla bla bla Urban is dead, he's done, never coach again, suicide watch, etc.
You can bet your maize and blue ass that every motherfucker sports journalist in America is getting acute carpal tunnel symptoms and severe, severe neck pain scrolling and digging and chasing every possible lead they can find about Urban Meyer, Horrible Man, Worse Than Stalin, BAD GUY.

Yet.

Nothing. No new facts. Other than that Courtney Smith is quite a drunk. That she was picked up on 3 (count them, three) DUIs and let go with the cops walking her home and each time she sobbed and wailed that Zach Smith, also quite a drunk, was chasing her. Except that he was at practice. I wonder why funny little Hitler Moustache Journalist ESPN Fired Toady Ass BITCH Bert McMurphy didn't include that in his interview? Or maybe he could have mentioned that she called the Powell Police Dept. on the 911 line 66 times in 90 days on domestic disputes, so many calls, DPo. Can you blame the PoPo for eventually not sending units to her address when she called?

There's more.  But it can wait.

That stony silence you hear from TOSU is the sound of a University silent screaming in pain. First the goddamn diving coach banging a 16 year old diver. Then Dr. Jelly Paws (this is actually what the wrestlers called him) fondling the balls and bungholes of hundreds of wrestlers who were complaining of things like headaches and nose pain. (He told them that they had "lymph nodes in their testicles and (he) had to check them." Seriously. There are no lymph nodes in your testicles, for the record. Well, maybe your testicles, Drew. But not on normal guys.)
Now crazy ass Courtney.

TOSU, it's pretty safe to say, did not have something on Urban Meyer that would justify firing him for cause. They would have done so already just because of the terrible optics of this situation. But if they can't show cause and they part ways with him anyway they owe him, oh, let's say, about 40 million dollars. That's a lot of money when every wrestler who ever donned a onesy for Ohio State is about to sue your ass.
So the Board of Trustees is going to make this call. Nobody else.  Not some schlub SEC chump on ESPN. Not Bart McMoron. Not some hopes-up-high scUM fan. The BoT. Because we are talking about contracts and cash. I see a three or four game suspension, just for the PC optics problem, but Urban Meyer keeps the job. The BoT is digging just as hard as Fred McMurray is right now to find a way to keep him.

Warmest regards,

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Time To Move On In Columbus

Excellent post DPo.

While it's possible that Urbs will return to the OSU sideline I think he's done. The Ohio State Athletic Dept has made a total mess out of what is basically a pretty straight forward issue. Domestic violence is not supposed to be tolerated. Meyer himself had the practice facility festooned with banners and signs saying things like Respect Women and It's Not Alright To Throw Pregnant Women Into Walls and stuff like that. He has shit canned several players who were charged with domestic violence against girlfriends ( though, truth be told, he was probably more interested in getting down to that magic scholarship number.)
In any event.
I don't buy the whole "he's Earle Bruce's grandson" gambit either. Earle was ramping up his dementia when Urbs came to Ohio State so I'm not even sure if coach Bruce could even recognize his grandson.
And it wasn't like Zach Smith was a good receiver coach. He wasn't. Urban Meyer himself referred to the receiving corps as a "clown show" before the 2015 season.
So, why did Urbs lug this perpetually drunk, wife terrorizing, fat, bald shitty receiver coach from Florida to Columbus AND keep him on the staff after he knew the guy's marriage was imploding and that he was knocking his wife around? And, yes, of course he fucking knew. There may not be direct evidence but, come on. All the wives are texting about Courtney calling the cops, Courtney getting stalked, Courtney getting yanked around and Urban Meyer doesn't know about it? I'll come back to the Zach Smith, horrible employee question.

So many fuck ups here. The first time he hears about this, Meyer goes to Gene Smith, the AD, drops the news on him and says, "oh, by the way, I fired his ass." That should have been it. Or, when they ask Meyer at the BIG media days about the 2015 incident, he says "no comment but we are investigating it". Instead he asks the reporter why he his making things up. Huh? And finally, is it paid administrative leave or unpaid? Paid makes Ohio State look bad. Because this issue is not going away and Urban Meyer is not going to coach again at Ohio State.

The answer to why Zach Smith was kept around is, Zach Smith was tolerated and covered up for and made excuses for because he was the RECRUITING COORDINATOR. And he was a good one. Ohio State is an NFL football factory for crying out loud. Just look at the talent out there. But, wait now, Zach Smith is a total douche. Does he just have an incredible knack for wooing teenagers to Columbus? Or does he have a few tricks up his sleeve that are not completely, oh, let's say "wholesome"?

This is why Ohio State needs to get its shit together TODAY. There is nothing to investigate. Zach Smith is gone. His ex-wife has told her story and it's an ugly one. Maybe TOSU can find some weasel room to keep Urban Meyer but the shit smell will remain. That's recruiting poison. Ohio State needs to take the high road (even though everyone will know it's bullshit and too little too late) and move on from Meyer. Make Ryan Day the head coach. Don't expect to win every game for a year or two. But put this whole mess in the rear view mirror before you invite any more scrutiny because the wolves are out in Columbus and they smell blood.

Urban Meyer is a dead man walking.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Buh Bye, Urban and All Your Wife Beating Sheltering Staff

Being an apologist is unbecoming of the commish.

College football is cyclical, and within those cycles are dramatic ups and downs from year to year. Sure you can put together a great season followed by another one or two, but there is inevitable decline, a reloading, rebuilding, as it were. Unless you are dirty. We'll come back to that.

It's like the Tour de France. Sure somebody has to win the stage but if you are a guy who is tearing up the Alps one day, the human body needs a day or two to recover so you are off the back on the next day. Day after day at the front of the field is humanly impossible. Unless you are dirty.

Institutions of higher learning are not fond of having their employees kick the shit out of pregnant women. Repeatedly. And they put in place rules to out the shit stains that allow those dickless cunts to continue to throw their wives around. So why risk careers keeping Zach Smith on staff when he is the shittiest coach on one of the best teams in Big 10 history? The Earl Bruce's grandson schtick is a smoke screen. Don't believe that loyalty bullshit. This is a profession that fires their own children or best friends for one blown call despite thousands of right ones.

Nope. To paraphrase the Zachster, "If they try to fire me, I'm bringing them all down." Now, what kinda shit does he have on Urbs and the staff that would allow him to keep his job while smacking around his preggo wife while their three year old daughter clings to her leg??? Certainly not the ol' "the whole staff knew, it's an open secret" thing. That is weak sauce, amigos.

Nope. Zach knows how dirty Ohio State is that allows them to stockpile recruits there in ... Columbus. Seriously? People with free will choose to go to Columbus? I doubt it. The shit is deep and it goes beyond free tattoos and car leases.

Now the Commish will paint Urban Meyer as the victim, but don't you believe him. Just look at the 8x10 Urban headshot on the Commish's nightstand next to his bottle of lotion and tissues. Despite Jimbosuke's man-boy lust for Urbs, he knows what is at the core of the man he worships. Look at the trail of criminals he protected in Gatorland or the co-eds he diddled, the murders he covered up.

The reign has ended. And the scab that is Columbus will be peeled back exposing the maggot filled pus ball that is THE Ohio State football cofefe.