This weeks games, Douchebags:
Utah v Utah State. Mormonius Clusterfuckius. Socky Focky. 5 dollah.
Qspot: K State (21) v Miami. Money so easy it's sick. Get some pictures of dead baby seals, okay?
Clemson (14) v Ball State. Really, Timmy? Ball State? Don't tell us you're gay if that becomes an issue.
Va Tech (15) v Austin Peay. Timmy! out-douchebagged in the pay-day game dept. ClemboSlice!
Michigan (19) v Air Force. McLovin', you are absolutely screwed royal. Batter dipped shit season.
Florida (24) v Texas A&Ream. RandChancre popped by AgDouches.
Wisco (13) v Oregon State. Badgers butt-stabbed by Beavs. Sorry, ScoSyph.
Florida SemenBank (6) v Savannah State. ChipSTD, please. You disgust me. Totally.
Oregon (4) v Fresno State. Who's the dill-hole who took Oregon? I forgot. Go to HELL.
Grambling State v TCU (20). I am a beautiful human being. I love me some ME.
Duke v Stanford (25). Hello, Ream Land. Meet skHank.
Ohio U v New Mexico State. BroSlut Bobcat. Smell my fingers.
W.Virgina Cornholers with the bye week, SeaScrote? Shell fish poisoning can be fatal. Just mentioning.
Puke-a-zoid. Boring, boring season so far. Try to do better, FagMagnets.
Death to West Canada Valley.
Summer's Eve, Michigan spanks the fly-boys Bro....take Air Force as your pick this week and you'll lose the sweep !! TSP
ReplyDeleteWest Canada Wuss Clan goes down to the mighty Redskins of James Fenimore Cooper's TOWN...TSP
ReplyDeleteEven without our resident stoner Sammy Watkins we (note the allegiance to my teame with the "we", "our" love) are 27 point favorites. Mellow weekend ahead for sammy.....
ReplyDeleteLove the team spirit, Timmy!
ReplyDeleteSplif sammy stoner weekend watkins. Word.
Shit, I'm hosed:
ReplyDeleteEUGENE, Ore. (AP) -- The University of Oregon is implementing random drug testing of all its athletes, following a media report earlier this year that estimated from 40 to 60 percent of the football team smoked marijuana.
Oregon's previous drug policy allowed for testing when there was reasonable suspicion. A recent decision by the general counsel gives temporary permission for random testing effective this month. The policy still faces a public hearing in early October.
ESPN The Magazine's April report was based on interviews with 19 current or former Oregon players and officials, and it accompanied a larger piece that looked at marijuana use among college football players nationwide.
In July, Oregon's athletic department proposed the changes to strengthen its drug policy. Under it, student-athletes will be subject to random tests year-round, even in the summer. A number system will identify athletes for testing.
The random tests have not begun, according to university officials.
Oregon has not changed its penalties for positive tests.
For illicit drugs, athletes receive counseling and education after a first positive test. A second results in a "behavior modification contract" between the student and the coach. Athletes are ineligible for half of a season following a third failed test, and will be dismissed from the team and lose their scholarship for the fourth.
For performance-enhancing drugs like steroids, athletes face suspension after the first positive test and dismissal after the second.
Read more: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2012/football/ncaa/09/06/oregon-drug-testing.ap/index.html#ixzz25mv71KhT
D.Po, no worries. This will never survive the public hearing. 99% of public officials and 100% of ordinary citizens, state wide in Oregon, are baked ALL THE TIME. Do you think they want to watch a bunch of drug-free tools stumble around the gridiron getting the shit kicked out of them by the likes of Stanford, USC and Oregon State? No. October is a life time away. Ask McLovin'.
ReplyDeleteOh, SWEET! Just got done talking to skHank. Wanted to know how he did last week. Hasn't mastered the blogosphere, apparently. Gave him the bad news, "Minus three, Worm!!". "But, I won!?" he said. "That's right. You won. MINUS THREE, Douche! Now get the hell out of my office!! I'm fucking calling Security RIGHT NOW!"
ReplyDeleteA beautiful, beautiful BRFL moment. The kind we all live for.
I got a little choked up, to be honest.
Tell him he lost 5 points for not logging into the blog. Says so in the Living Document, which he hasn't read. Another -5.
DeleteWord
DeleteLOVE the negative 5 levy...gets him closer to me in the shitter....D Po, gotta agree with the Commish that we'll never see random drug tests like they are proposing...you should be good...but then, that's ME saying that, and I cannot be relied upon for good decision making ( see -11 first week "performance" )
DeleteTSP
Fly Boys try to take down my Wolverines, but we win by a claw.....Badgers not so kind to their owner this season...TSP
ReplyDelete