Bowlapalooza, Chapter 8 Results

Bill Snyder: KSU Guru

West Virginia ass-whupped by Miami, 14-31. Bowl points for Randude.
Utah squeaks by Indiana, 24-26.
Texas A&M loses a close one to Kansas State, 28-31. Bill Snyder is what, 95 and still winning?

KLittlePony with the SWEEP. Add 5 to take back the lead at 55.
CCSuckie with the SWEEP. Add 5 to go to 54.
DPo with the deuce. Makes it 52.
BroFancy with the double. Makes it 51.
SeanSuck with 2 brings him up to 47.
Killer Babe with only 1, 46.
BoSuke with just 2, 47.
Randilingus hammers  home the SWEEP. Adds 5 to go to 44.
McLuvin'. Deuce. 43.
Snottie. 2. 42.
SockPocket. Uno. 38.
Teebs. Satellite pictures have him riding a yak through Kazakhstan doing God knows what. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 7 Results

Chapter 7.
A total disaster.
Out of 11 people that picked (Teebs would have been the twelfth but, well) 9 got ZERO right.
Randy picked the Baylor game. And McLuvin' had the biggest day with 2 out of 3.

Minnesota 17 over Washington State 12.
Boise State goes down to Baylor, 12-31. No bowl points for BroFace.
Pitt bows to Northwestern, 24-31.

DPud 0, has 50.
KFoofer 0, 50.
CCS 0, 49.
BroFart 0, 49.
KillerBomb 0, 46.
BoDouchy 0, 45
SeaScrotum 0, 45
McLuvin' 2, Baylor and Northwestern. 41.
Snottie 0, 40
Randude 1, 39
SockPuppet 0, 37
Teebs. Deep Cover. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 6 Results

Chapter 6:

NCState upsets Vanderbilt, 41-17 Ass-beat.
Temple Owls can't catch up to Wake Forest, 26-34 the final.
Army knocks off North Texas. Never bet against a service academy, sayeth the Mind Freak.

DPo. Nails the Army game. Thank God for that stupid N. Texas trick play. 1. 50.
KLittlePony. Ditto. 1. 50.
CCSuck. Also loves the Army Black Knights. 1. 49
BroFace. Let down by the Owls. 2 to go to 49. Progress.
KillerBlossom. Lovin' the USMA. 1. 46. Lost some ground.
'BoSucky. Thank you, Army. 1. 45. Outlook: grim.
SuckySeannie. Temple Owls fuck over. 2. 45.
Snottie. Got one courtesy of the Black Knights. 40.
Randong. Nailed the NC State game. Otherwise... meh. 1 to go to 38.
SockLoser. Army helps you avoid the goose egg. 1 to go to 37.
McLuvin'. Holy fucking SHIT. 3/3. SWEEP. 5 to go to 39. I think rehab was worth it for you.
Teebs. "Business Trip" to Beijing got messy. Extended hospitalization. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 5 Results

Chapter 5:

Ohio Bobcats bested by Troy, 23-28.
Hawai'i with the upset as turn-overs doom Middle Tennessee, Rainbow Warriors 52-35.
Miami of Ohio loses by a whisker to Mississippi State, 16-17.

CCS gets 2 out of 3. 48. How was your time at the top, Chipendale?
BroFuck with the deuce. 47.
KManBoyLove 3 for 3, SWEEP to retake the lead at 49.
Killer Bee stumbles. Only 1 this time. 45.
DPucker is perfect in this chapter. 5 for the SWEEP. Tied for the lead with 49.
BoSuke with a pair to go to 44.
SeannieBronie with a double to go to 43.
Snottie takes 2 to rise to 39.
SockPuppet really struggling. 1. 36. Not paying attention?
McLuvin' gets 2. Major step forward for this douche. 34.
Randbung nails 1,2 and 3. SWEEP. Almost respectable at 37.
Teebs! Pour a little 4-Loco on the ground for our lost Homie. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 4 Results

Idaho upsets Colorado State, 61-50. Sheeeiiiit.
Central Meechy dropped by Old Dominion, 24-20.
Louisiana Tech edges Navy 48-45.

No sweeps.

CCS adds 2 and holds the lead at 46.
BroFroski picks up the deuce and steps to 45
KBroniePony falters and picks only 1. 44
Killer Bitch takes 2 and moves into a tie for third. Makin' moves. 44
DPo has 2 to go to 44.
BoSuke nabs 2 to go to 42. Got to love this guy.
SeanScuz gets a pair to go to 41. Remember when Seannie was somebody in GG?
Snott. Deuce. 37. Train keep a rollin'.
SockPupa. 1. ONE. 35.
McLuvin'. I don't know you, if anybody asks. Zero. Stay at 32, Total Failure.
Randilingus. 1. Gag me. 32.
Teebs! Deep in the bunker, wallowing in shame. No entry. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 3 Results

Tulsa Golden Hurricanes ass-whip Central Meechy, 55-10 the final.
Western Kentucky dumps all over Memphis, 51-31.
BYU edges the Wyoming Cowboys 24-21.

DPo blows the Wyoming game. 2 to go to 42.
CCSlut crushes this one. SWEEP. 5 to become the new leader at 44.
SeanSuck with the deuce to go to 39.
BroFrog hits a homer. SWEEP. Add 5 to go to 43.
KMart adds 2. 43 is the total.
Killer Bee nails all three. SWEEP. 5 to go to 42. Climbing the ladder.
McLuvin'. What the hell is going on with you? Zero. Stay at 32.
Jimbosuke pounds one more out of the park. SWEEP. 5 to go to 40. So much better than McLuvin'.
Randildo gets the deuce to go to 31.
SockPuppet with the hat-trick and the SWEEP. 5 to go to 34. New life.
Snott keeps throwing strikes. All 3 spells SWEEP. 5 to go to 35.
Teebs! International hostage situation. Missing still. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 2 Results

GG Bowlapalooza, Chapter 2:

App State sneaks by the Toledo Rockets 31-28.
UCF curb-stomped by Arkansas State 31-13.
Southern Mississippi downs Louisiana-Lafayette 28-21.

KLube picks up 2 to take back the lead at 41.
DPo gets only one. "Second place: a set of steak knives". 40
CCSuperSuck with 1. 39 makes you third.
BroFellatio a sad 1 gives you 38.
SeaGrass, 2 to go to 37.
KillerBitch with the SWEEP, 5 moves her up to 37 as well. Big day.
Jimbosuke with a SWEEP. 5 to go to 35. Leap frogs....
...McLuvin'. Gets the deuce, best effort in awhile. 32
Randiddle. 1 to go to 29. some people have 40, Randy.
Snottie hits it out of the park. SWEEP to go from 25 to 30.
Sock with a 2 to land at 29
Teebs. AWOL. 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Bowlapalooza, Chapter 1 Results

GG Bowls, Chapter 1:

North Carolina U loses to Grambling, 20-21.
New Mexico 23 over UTSA 20.
Houston man-handled by SDState, 10-34. Big day for Donnell Pumphrey.


KDawg: Sweep! 5 to go to the lead with 39.
DPull: 2, betrayed by Houston. Share the lead with 39.
CCSuck: 2 to go to 38.
BroFondle: 2 adds up to 37.
SeaScum: Big Fat Zero. 35. Losing your touch much?
Killer Bee: 2 gives her 32 total.
McLuvin': Poor performance. 1 to go to 30.
'BoSuke: 2 brings him up to 30. Yeah.
Randoop: 2 brings him to 28
Sock Puppet: Solid 2 jacks him to 27.
Snottie: Measly 1 brings him to 25.
Teebs: Mysterious disappearance. No entries. Another secret mission? 24.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

Bowlapalooza News Flash

Turns out I forgot one.
The Quick Lane Bowl, Dec. 26th. Maryland v Boston College.

Here's what we do:

Go to the last group ( think it's group 14). Add the Quick Lane Bowl pick to your pick for the Sugar Bowl and the CFP championship game. This gives us a three game set. 1 for each win and 5 for the sweep.

I updated the "Shock and Awe" post.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

Heismaniac 2.2 The Results Show

It was close and then it wasn't. Everyone had Ozzmatazz Jackson as the winner, as well as QB and ACC in their high scoring first row of the Heismaniac 2.2 grid. That is 105 points for the taking right there folks. So with an eight-way tie, we moved on to the second pick, which was Bisquiteen Watson. Now this round separated the scab from the chancre. Seannie and J-jizz failed to log any more points and brought up each other's rear. Further proof that their pillow talk led to group think. They were, effectively, no longer factors. But K-mart, McLuvin, Q and CCSpooge all picked up major points with the Watson pick. But it was C-Spooge  who cleaned house and swept the second row with a perfect 70 points. McLugnut and Qoooooh were second with 60 points.The rest of us - other than Seamonkey and J-jizz- all picked up 30 or 40 more points. 

The third row proved to be the toughest and only K-Y got points for his position selection of QB as the voters selected Boutros Boutros Mayfield as your second runner-up. CCSpunk had a ten point lead over McLuvin (McLuvin!) and Q going into the bonus/tie break round. Here I was awarding 2 points for each name you got right in the top 7 and 3 points for getting a name in the correct spot. 35 additional points up for grabs so the results were still in doubt. Qoooh, McLuvin and the DPo had 5 of the seven dudes correct. several dillholes had Smoochie Barrett. Laughable. Five dudes had two guys in the correct order;  the results of the bonus round were: McLuvin' (McLuvin'!) picked up 16 additional points, DPo added 15, K-pad, J-suck and CCSuck each added 14.

And the Winner of Heismaniac 2.2 is :

Chipenschlong!

Final Tally:

CCS: 189

McLuvin':181

Qooooh: 178

K-Mart: 169

DPo: 150

Paul: 143

Jimsucksatthis:119

SeaWeed:116

Bowlapalooza : Shock and Awe

Acknowledging the general dissatisfaction with dribbling out the Bowls 3 games at a time as they happen we are 'going in a different direction this year', Brothers and Sisters.
There will be one big release of all the bowls. You can take a look, do a little research but then you have to make all your picks all at once before December 17.

The games will be in batches of 3 games each. 1 for the win, 5 for the sweep. It's a tight race now so we're going to keep it simple. The only anomaly is the last two games, the Sugar Bowl and the College Football Championship. Otherwise it's a level playing field.

Group One: (all Dec. 17th)

Air Force Reserve Bowl;  North Carolina U vs Grambling. Atlanta, Ga., noon.
Gildan New Mexico Bowl: New Mexico vs UTSA (might be Univerity of Texas San Antonio) in Albuquerque, NM. 2 PM
Geico Las Vegas Bowl: Houston vs San Diego State. Las Vegas, Nevada. 3:30 PM

Group Two: (also, all Dec 17th)

Camellia Bowl: Appalachian State vs. Toledo. Montgomery, Ala. 5:30 PM
AutoNation Cure Bowl: UCF vs. Arkansas State. Orlando, Fla. 5:30 PM
New Orleans Bowl: Southern Mississippi vs. Louisiana-Lafayette. New Orleans, La. 9 PM

Group Three: (Dec. 19. 20 and 21)

Miami Beach Bowl: Central Michigan vs. Tulsa
Boca Raton Bowl: Western Kentucky vs. Memphis
Poinsettia Bowl: BYU vs. Wyoming

Group Four (Dec. 22 and two games on the 23rd)

Idaho Potato Bowl: Idaho vs. Colorado State
Bahamas Bowl: Eastern Michigan vs. Old Dominion
Armed Forces Bowl: Louisiana Tech vs. Navy.

Group Five (Last game of Dec. 23, Dec 24, first game of Dec. 26)

Dollar General Bowl:Ohio Bobcats vs. Troy
Hawai'i Bowl: Hawai'i vs. Middle Tennessee
St. Petersburg Bowl: Miami (Ohio) vs. Mississippi State

Group Six ( Dec 26, first game of Dec. 27)

Independence Bowl:NC State vs, Vanderbilt
Heart of Dallas Bowl: Army vs, North Texas
Military Bowl: Temple vs. Wake Forest

Group Seven (Dec 27, 28)

Holiday Bowl: Minnesota vs Wash State
Cactus Bowl: Boise State vs Baylor
Pinstripe Bowl: Pitsburgh vs. Northwestern

Group Eight: (Dec 28)

Russell Athletic Bowl: West Virginia vs Miami
Foster Farms Bowl: Indiana vs Utah
Texas Bowl: Texas A&M vs Kansas State

Group Nine: (Dec 29)

Birmingham Bowl: South Florida v South Carolina
Belk Bowl: Arkansas vs. Virginia Tech
Valero Bowl: Oklahoma State vs. Colorado

Group Ten: (Dec. 30)

Liberty Bowl: Georgia vs. TCU
Sun Bowl: Stanford vs. North Carolina
Music City Bowl: Nebraska vs. Tennessee

Group Eleven: (Dec 30, 31)

Arizona Bowl: South Alabama vs. Air Force
Orange Bowl: Michigan vs. Florida State
Citrus Bowl: LSU vs. Louisville

Group Twelve: (Dec 31)

TaxSlayer Bowl: Georgia Tech vs. Kentucky
Peach Bowl: Washington U vs. Alabama
Fiesta Bowl: Ohio State vs. Clemson

Group Thirteen: (Jan 2)

Outback Bowl: Florida Vs Iowa
Cotton Bowl: Western Michigan vs. Wisconsin
Rose Bowl
: USC vs. Penn State

Group Fourteen: (Dec 26, Jan 2 and 9)

Quick Lane Bowl: Maryland v Boston College
Sugar Bowl: Auburn v Oklahoma
College Football Championship: You pick it now. Wash U, Alabama, Ohio State or Clemson.

Roll the bones one last time, People.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

BRFL Week 14 Results

Week 14;

Washington U bungholes the Buffs. Wash U 41, Colorado 10. Don't look now but CCSumbitch is nosing into Untouchable Land. 5 for the win (conference playoff wins pay 5), 1 for the no drop, 6 on the weekend puts him at 37, the Leader.

Ohio State had the week off. 1 for the no drop. 28 for Q.

Louisville didn't play. Still, the AP moves them up 1 and they snag the no drop. 24 for SeaMonkey.

Teebs! Insult to injury. AP drops the Evil Wolverine Conspiracy 1 point. And they didn't play. 22.

McLovin' scores big. Clemson 38, Virginia Tech 20. DeShaun Watson impresses. 5 for the win, 1 for the no drop. 6 pointer and he romps to 22. Tied with his butt-buddy Teebs!

Alabama downs Florida, 54-16. Too many injuries on the Gator squad to hang with the Elephant. KBronie drops 5 to 21.

Boise State had the week to rest. They are unranked now so a big fat naught for the weekend. BroFro still with 17.

Miami. Bye week. Randiddle gets zero. Has 12.

Florida State mysteriously moved up 2 by the AP on their week off. Snottie has 11,with the no drop.

Iowa. AP moves them up one. No drop makes it 2 for DPo. He's got 7.

Oregon. Bye. Weird new coach hire. SkHank with 0.

And thence into the Land of the Lost:

LSU. KillerBeyatch is ranked, but still negative. AP moves her up 2, 1 for the no drop. Minus 1. Win the bowl game and finish in positive territory. Probably still lose a ton of money.

Tennessee with the bye week. Minus 7. This was once a top 10 team. SockPuppet Sadness.

Oh. My. God. It can always get worse for 'BoSuke. Kansas State curb-stomps TCU 30-6 IN FORT WORTH. TCU cannot even score a touchdown against KSU at home. Am I even going to a bowl game? Who cares? TCU will lose. Minus 11.

Notre Dame. Bye week. Still minus 15. Horrible, horrible season in South Bend. If Brian Kelley wasn't an Irishman he'd be out on his ass. ClemboSlice suicide watch.

Prepare for the Bowls.

Jimbosuke
Commissioner for Life

.

GG Week 14 Results

GG Week 14 Results:

There was some sweepin' goin' on:

Colorado flops, 41-10 they collapse vs the Huskies. Why did they leave the injured QB in?
Wisco bested by hated Penn State, 38-31. James Franklin seems like a decent dude. What the fuck he's doing at Penn State is beyond me.
Oklahoma cuts the Cowboys down to size, 38-20. At least Mike Gundy has the proud Mullet.

DPo takes 2, holds onto the lead with 37.
CCSuck with the deuce, now with 36.
Tie for third:
SeaShorts takes 2 to go to 35.
BroFro takes 2 to go to 35.
KYJellyPony grabs 2 for 34.
KillerBronie with the pair up to 30. No sweep fo you, Killah Bee.
McLoseIt has 2 added to go to 29.
'BoSuke slams the Sweep hard. 5 to go to 28. Love him.
Randongus has a pair tacked  on to go to 26.
SockPuppet gets a couple to go to 25.
Snottie goes from zero to  hero with the Sweep. 5 puts him at 24.
Teebs! returns to form with a Fiver and he also has 24.


Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

Heismaniac 2.2 - The Peroration

The invites went out to the Downtown Athletic Club shindig this week and 5 dudes got the golden ticket. It is looking like this:

Jackson QB ACC

Westbrook WR Big 12

Mayfield QB Big 12

Watson QB ACC

Peppers LB/DB Big 10

Some things to note: No running backs were invited. That is kind of amazing, though it can be argued that Watson and Jackson are de facto running backs. But not up in here. For scoring, they are QBs.

No one from the SEC was invited. Suckers. I guess the bagmen don't make it north of the Mason-Dixon.

On the Heismaniac 2.2 grid you submitted, there are 9 possible scoring opportunities. Eight of us entered but nobody even sniffed out those Okies, nor the Big 12. Let's hope they are just in NY to be taunted for being hicks. At this point, only K-Mart has all grids still in play; as expected, McBooger has one third of his grid blacked out.

BRFL Week 13 Results

Wash U 45, Wash State U 17. 1 for the win, 2 for the move up. 1 for the no drop. Win this weekend and it's "hello, playoffs", Chipenhausen. You're like Jason, reaching for the Golden Fleece. Sort of. God Almighty Jesus, you have 31 and you are our Leader.

My eyes well with tears. The Glory of the Men of the Scarlet and Gray. Q, the Witch Queen, vanquishes the Evil Wolverine Conspiracy. TOSU 30, Michigan 27 A crazy week in Columbus, Ohio.
1 for the win. 1 for the no drop. Q checks in at 27. The Brass Ring within her grasp.

Florida takes a Gator Douche to FSU. Florida 13, FSU 31. KBroniePorno drops 2 to 26.
Good enough for the Liberace. Which is good enough for me, Buster.

But wait! There's more. Michigan  may not be done yet. A double OT loss to a team ranked higher than you is not, in the eyes of the Almighty AP, that big a deal. TOSU 30, Michigan 27, in double OT. Teebs! drops only 2 and needs only a misstep by Clemson or Washington or Wisconsin to be RIGHT BACK IN THIS FUCKER. Teeblations at 23.

Louisville 38, Kentucky 41. Wait. What? Does Louisville, in fact, suck? Lamar Jackson. Gaudy rushing stats but...three picks? Heismaniac just got a lot more interesting. Minus 5 power dive for Seannie G who sits at 22. God. Remember when it looked like you were going to win this thing? Personally I found that depressing. Now you are staring down the barrel of the Chik-Fil-A bowl.

Boise St 20, Air Force 27. Never bet against a Service Academy. Mind Freak said that years ago. Before the BRFL broke him. BroFro takes the Ream. Drops 5 additional points on his way down.
Blue Bronies not good to you. 17 is your new address.

Clemson 56, South Carolina 7. McLovin' opens a major can of whoop-ass on in-state rival SowCow. 1 for the win, 1 for move up. 1 for the no drop. Lands at 16. More importantly, he's playoff bound, if he takes care of business vs. Vagina Tech. Balls in  your court, McCheese.

Miami 40, Duke 21. Dead is dead, Randilingus. You get 1 for the win. Welcome to 12. You're bowl eligible. I see you breaking even or winning a dollar. I hope it was worth it.

Florida 13, Florida State 31. Snottie Rising. Seminoles Tomahawk the Gators and it's 1 for the win, 3 for the move up and a no drop adds 1 more. Bumps the SnotMaster up to 8 but that's about as far as it goes. Not eligible for the conference championship game. Good luck in the Meinecke Car Care Bowl, Loser.

Iowa 40, Nebraska 10. Diddle! Diddle! Diddle! Are you fucking kidding me, DPo? You land at  AP #22 (+3), 1 for the win, and +5 on the Diddle. Nine point bonanza. Out of the darkness, into the light. + 5 is your  new total.

Oregon 24, Oregon State 34 Henry's season comes to an ignominious end in Corvallis: losing to Oregon State for the first time since 2007. 34-24, Beavers over Ducks. No big surprise that the Oregon coach, Mark Helfrich, got the boot after this one. What a fucking disaster. I don't think you're bowl eligible. Hang your head in shame, Bitch. You finish with 0.

Tennessee 34, Vanderbilt 45.  Kyle Shurmur: 21/34 for 416 yds and 2 TDs. Unfortunately, "Kyle Shurmur" is Vanderbilt's QB. Who would you rather fire (be honest) Brian Kelly or Butch Jones?Suck into suck equals suck. 4-4 in conference play. God. I feel sick. Ream you, God damn it! Minus 1 on the way down. Here you are at minus 7, SockGenius. I'm not sure I want to hang out with you anymore.

LSU 54, Texas A&M 39. LSU scores at will and dumps TAMU. 1 for the win, 1 for the no drop and 4 for the move up. Bowl eligible and, by bowl time, you may have a Two Headed Monster at RB. +6 this week but, ultimately, a hugely disappointing season as you stand at -4. And you've had another coach shot out from under you, Killer Bee. You are, like, the Coaching Kiss of Death. First Mark Richt and now Les Miles. If I'm a coach in the SEC, I don't want to hear you knockin'.

TCU 31, Texas 9. How to feel about this? A totally irrelevant game, played between two terrible teams. In Austin. The bell tolls for Charlie Strong. Jimbosuke with a horrific pick. TCU might be good  next year. Fat fucking lot of good that does me at the pay out this year. Hatred. Minus 11.

USC 45, Notre Dame 27. In South Bend. USC hammers the Domers. Why in the name of Christ would you keep the Chameleon, aka Brian Kelly, around? The players are transferring. If I have Notre Dame on my schedule as a coach I just pencil in "ass-whip". ClemboSlice, you are roasting in hell fire. Minus 15. My Brother. We have the worst teams in the BRFL.

On to the Conference Championships, Brothers and Sisters,

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

Conference Championship wins are worth 5 points. See "The Living Document" (BRFL Rule Book).

Final Four - The College Football Playoff Clusterfuck

Final Four

With the final college football playoff poll hinging on this weekend's slate of contests, only two teams are sure things: Alabama and O$U. Realistically, this is a year where there is no question who the best team is: Alabama has no peers, or is it piers, I always forget. It pains me to say that but the NCAA is toothless and has always turned a blind eye to the goings on in the SEC so Bama's reign, or is it rain, I always forget, continues. Ohio State is the second team in the country and despite that, will not be playing for the B1G championship in Indy. We know how things roll down there on the banks of the Olentangy. Whoa, Nellie!

So then there is #3 Clemson taking on Virginia Tech. Apparently VT only sucks when I pick them as my BRFL team. A Clemson loss could make things interesting. Washington currently sits at #4 and they take on Colorado, who are in the top 10 despite a 17 point loss to Michigan, after Michigan outscored them 45-7 in the last 3 quarters. Go Buffs. Does a Colorado win put Michigan in the final four?

The B1G championship pits two more top ten teams who Michigan beat by a total of 46 points. If the committee takes Penn State, I join Jimmy H and be like:

Prediction for the weekend: Chaos.