BRFL Week 7 Results

 Week 7.

There were no less than 5 byes out of 14 BRFL teams this week. That's fucking crazy.

Lola. What the hell happened? Stanford 16 @ Notre Dame 14. A season-crushing loss in South Bend? Find a creative accountant. Maybe you can write this season down. Zero on Week 8. Stay at - 28.

CCS. Jimi Kaks turns the Meechy Death Machine loose on the Nittany Lions. James Franklin gets owned. scUM 41, PSU 17. Ouch. Penn State is done. Ann Arbor is a bitch-ass Ho this year. 1 for the win, 1 for the move up, 1 for the no drop. Tre. + 14 on the season.

Houston with the Bye. DPo's Cougars aren't ranked so it's as if nothing happened. Stay @ minus 3.

Bronyism lives in Seattle. Oregon with the Bye. But wait!! AP shows +2 love. 1 for the no drop. +3 on the weekend and you...didn't. Even. Play. Move on up to +11. That's how it's done, Son.

What did I tell  you about MooU, Teeblations? They may NOT suck (that much) after all. At least they don't suck as much as Wisconsin 👍. Meechy State 34, Wisco CheeseHeads 28 in OT. +1 for the win. Minus 10 on the season. 

Jimbo$$uke. Texas 24, Iowa State Cyclones 21. You had to watch this game to know how good it was. You probably didn't watch this game. Fuck you. 1 for the win, 1 for the no drop, plus 2 AP love and, well, lookie here, lookie  here. 'Bo$uke takes the lead with + 16.

SockPuppet. Baylor visits West Virginia and loses by 3. WVU 43, Baylor 40. Is the BIG-12 maybe the most fun conference to watch? Sure but, still, you lost. And you are down in a deep, deep hole at - 15.

Q. Iowa Hawkeyes with the Bye. Kirk Ferentz and his kid probably scored a Father-Son hooker 'date' this weekend. Why not? As pointed out earlier in this weekly bloviation, Kirk Ferentz has a BASE SALARY of $4,800,000 and his son,  the laughably underqualified OC for the Hawkeyes, scrapes a BASE of $890,000 off the table every year.  The DC, Phil Parker, who fields an all-conference defense yearly, and has been coaching since sonny boy Brian Ferentz was 5 years old,  makes 860 grand.

Where's the justice?

Iowa @ +3 in the BRFL.

Dog THE Bounty Hunter. An Instant Epic. USC swaggers into Provo, demolishes the Utes in the first half and ends up getting corked 43 to 42 at the closing bell. Suddenly, in BRFL terms, Utah rises from the dead. 1 for the win, 1 for the no drop, and +5 on the move-up in the AP. +7 on the weekend, minus 3 on the season. Never bet against the Dog. 

BroFro. NC State goes down to the OrangeMen of Syracuse on the road 9 - 24 and, worse, they lose their all-conference QB for the season with a torn pectoral. Does the GG Sweep salve the wound for the Breaux? Neaux. Horrific power-dive in the AP, minus 8. A crushing bleaux for BroFo as his season sits at minus 2.

Wisconsin 28, Meechy State 34. We've been over this. Snottie has had better seasons. His head coach has already been axed. It's a struggle. And it's probably going to get worse. Snottie, you are at minus 9. Your highest aspiration should be to end the season at minus 9.

ChiChi. Cincinnati doesn't play. But, yeah, Baby, that no drop point comes home, right, Bitch? Cincinnati at +9, but don't jizz yourself, Turdface. There's a new Liberace wannabe in town...

...USC takes a douching at the hands of the Utah Utes. 43 - 42 the final, Trojans on the losing end. Some unseemly whining by Lincoln Riley there at the end but, what the fuck, nobody trusts that son of a bitch. 

The AP slaps the proverbial 'Big Cock' across USC's face with a 5 point drop in the poll. USC now at +13. Bend over for the candelabra, Ronde'. USC at +13.

McLovin. Ohio State with the Bye. Next up, Iowa and the Ferentz Family Values. "Drive, drive on down that field, Men of the Scarlet and Gray..." No drop point feels so good. +3 on the season.

Next week is almost here, Brothers and Sisters.

Jimbo$$uke

Commissioner for Life