Close Shave in Heismaniac

A stalwart seven leaguers had the balls to play the beleaguered Heismaniac 3.0 - Kick to the Jewels edition. As a refresher, here is the order of finish for the soon-to-be-brain traumas:

1.Baker AlreadyGotCTE Mayfield, OU, QB Big12
2. Bryce WholeLotta Love, Stanford, RB, Pac12
3. Lamar DontCallMeTito Jackson, Louisville, QB, ACC
4. Saquon MomCouldntSpellSequin Barkley, Penn State, RB
5. Rasheed Shiny Penny, San Diego State, RB
6. Jonathon How'dIGetAWhiteGuyName Taylor, Wisconsin, RB
7. Mason DicksOn Randolph, OKState, QB

Here's your ballot. Check my work.

Your Heismaniac 3.0: The Kick to the Jewels Ballot Form:

	5pts	10pts	20 pts
	Conference	Position	Player
First	SEC	RB	Barkley	x3
Second	B1G	QB	McCringleberry	x2
Third	SEC	RB	Musberger	x1

Pretty cool. Let's start with the total losers.

Here's Jimboske's picks:

First: BiG10 RB JTBarrett
Second: Big12 QB Saquon Barkley
Third: FBS Independent RB Baker Mayfield

The Seven:

Saquon Barkley RB PSU
JT Barrett QB THE Ohio State University
Mason Rudolph QB Okie State
Josh Adams RB Notre Dame
Baker Mayfield QB Oklahoma
Josh Adams RB Notre Dame
Lamar Jackson QB Louisville
Jonathan Taylor RB Wisconsin

Total whiff on the grid. Picks up 10 points for having 5 guys right, none in the right order. You suck. This is bad and Suke should feel bad. Hasn't been the same since smacking the mellon. Bike helmets, kids. 

Brofro- He's picking up whatever the Commish is putting down. Here's Pubefro's picks:

Barrett RB Big10
Barkley QB Big 10
Mayfield QB Big 12

Adams
Jackson
Hurts
Love

Nada for the players, 10 points for getting the 3rd place position, zip for Conference. picks up 8 for the players. 18 points. Impressive. For a monkey, maybe.

K-jizz - gets hisself some 53 points. His picks:

Big 12 RB Barkley
Big 10 RB Barrett
PAC 12 QB Mayfield

Barkley
Mayfield
Barrett
Hurts
Adams
Love
Jackson

He gets 45 points from the grid, 8 points for his list. 53 points total. Whatever.

That brings us to internet tough guy, Sock - I guess you could say he tried? Picks? Picks:

1) Barkley QB Big 10
2) Mayfield RB Big 12
3) Love QB Pac-10

Barkley
Mayfield
Love
Barrett
Adams
Tate
Hurts

60 points from the grid, 6 points from the list. 66 points. Close one, Ass Juice. 

Speaking of anal leakage, CCS thought it would be his year. No. No, it was not.

Big10 RB Barkley
Pac12 RB Love
Big12 QB Barrett

1)Barkley PSU RB
2)Love Stanford RB
3)Barrett OSU QB
4)Mayfield Okla QB
5)Adams ND RB
6)Rudolph Okla St QB
7)Hurts Bama QB

Chapped Schlong gets 70 points from the grid, and 11 from the list, including 3 points for having Love in all the right places. Third place overall. You get nothing but an appreciative nod.

Now we are talking real separation. Check the maths cuz I was shaking like a school girl thinking I had won this thing.

McLuvin picked hard:

First BiG10 QB Baker Mayfield

Second Big12 RB Saquon Barkley

Third ACC Lamar Jackson


Seven Dude:
1-Saquon Barkley (PSU RB)
2-Baker Mayfield (Oklahoma QB)
3-Lamar Jackson (Louisville QB)
4-Bryce Love (Stanford RB)
5-Mason Rudolph (Oklahoma State QB)
6-J.T. Barrett (Ohio State QB)
7-Jalen Hurts (Alabama QB)

By my calculations: 80 points for players, 60 on the sweep of positions, 5 for conference. 145 pts.

He changes his list a bit and gets 10 points for guys and 3 points for having Jackson in the right order. Total points 155.

Which brings us to his Holiness DPo, The Creator.

Behold his heavenly picks:

1. Bigly 10 QB Mayfield
2. PAC12 RB Barrett
3. Bigly 10 QB Barkley

1.Mayfield
2. Barrett
3. Barkley
4. Love
5. Adams
6. Tate
7. Hurts

Gets 60 for Mayfield, 60 for sweeping the positions, 10 for conferences. 130 points.

Gets 6 for the list and 3 for the bonus for Mayfield. Total 139

Your 2017 Heismaniac Champion is:

McLovin!