BRFL 2017; Damage Report

And so we come to the end of another season.
The Damage Report was sent to you by email.

It was a long season. We avoided the Mikepocalypse. DPo earns some serious redemption for sparing us that horror. We saw another BRFLer's coach fired, this time KBron's lame Florida head man.

GG was an exciting back and forth contest. Some hard feelings over a couple games that were posted on short notice. The Commissioner was on in-hospital rotation for three weeks over the holidays and had a little trouble keeping up. Still, I think the "three sets of three games" format works for the bowls.
Share thoughts and warm feelings at the payout.

Couple things about the payout.
August seems a busy month and many have been unable to make the Most Sumptuous Feast on Fair Street lately. So I am going to try to move our Love-In up to July. Have to snake it around all the Hall of Fame nonsense that goes on in the summer but shouldn't be too hard.
Regarding GG and Heismaniac we clearly need a Treasurer. BroFro offered to do that a couple years ago and I will revisit that with him. The problem is that there is no BRFL Central Bank. So we start every year with zero funds. This is problematic for GG and Heismaniac. Every year I forget to collect GG and Heismaniac entry fees (because I am extremely intoxicated by that point in the evening). And every year I can't remember who paid and who didn't (because...extremely intoxicated). To make GG work every one has to first put their 20 dollars in the bank. The BRFL front office can't deduct it from their winnings because not everybody wins and not everybody plays these side games. And the BRFL winnings are paid solely from the losses of others.

So we needs us a treasurer to hold onto the dough, perhaps invest it in some scam like Bitcoin and quadruple it. And then pay it out next year.
Also, really, a little disappointed in the Heismaniac participation.

Lots to talk about at the Jambo. But, as usual, I probably won't listen.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

This one's for you, KBronie

BRFL 2017: The Final Tally

BRFL End of Season Results:

First to address a question that has come up before; no-drop points after the end of the conference championships. Simply stated, no-drop points don't get awarded unless a NEW AP Poll comes out. Think about why this is. You have dozens of bowl games happening over weeks. You have play off games. And, yes, wins in those games have an effect on the dropping or no-dropping. But how much? Who knows? The AP knows but they ain't sayin' until the last poll. Said Poll which comes out after the National Championship game. So there are no no-drop points awarded after bowl games or after the first round of the playoffs. In fact nothing at all happens after bowl games or the first round, except the lucky BRFLers who win those games bank the points for the wins.

For McLovin this is a crushing blow and a grave disappointment. Sad face. For the rest of us it's why we have been spared The Mikepocalypse; the humiliation of watching the guy who won it last year and picked DEAD LAST in the draft walk away with The Whole Cheese again.

Starting from the bottom:

#15, with unranked Florida, KBronieManWoman hits a serious sophomore slump.
Start with -7, no win, no no-drop, no move up = -7 BRFL

#14, with unranked Meechy, Timmy! The Evil Wolverine Conspiracy drops their bowl game, 19-26 to South Carolina. A promising season ends in disappointment.
Start with -6, no win, no no-drop, no move up = -6 BRFL

#13, unranked Kansas State. Q finishes strong with the bowl win, 35-17 over UCLA. Ends with + 2.
Started at -1, win the bowl that's 3, no no-drop, no move up = 2 total BRFL

#12, 20th ranked Stanford. Chip n' Dale drops the bowl to TCU, 37-39.
Start with 14. No win, no no-drop, AP drops you 5 = 9 BRFL

#11, unranked Utah. Randoogle wins the bowl game, 30-14 over WVU.
Starts at 8, 3 for the win, no no-drop, no move up = 11 BRFL.

#10 16th ranked Washington Huskies. ClemboSlice with another Season of Despair. Fucking Wash U could only beat shitty teams. Sad. Drops the bowl, 28 - 35 to Penn State.
Start with 17, no win, no no-drop,  wrathful AP drops you 4 = 13 BRFL

#9, 12th ranked USC. Bridgshit betrayed by the Curse of Sam Darnold. Drops the bowl to Mighty Ohio State, 7 - 24.
Starts with 19, no win, no-no drop, AP carves you a minus 4 = 15 BRFL.

#8. 24th ranked Virginia Tech. SkHunk gets bent over by the Okie State Cowboys, 21-30 in the bowl.
Starts with 18. No win, no-no drop, AP takes you down two pegs = 16 BRFL total.

#7,  21st ranked USouthFlorida. The Kitten in his debut season goes out with guns blazing. 38-34 over Texas Tech in the bowl.
Starts with 12. 3 for the win, 1 for the no-drop, 2 for the move up = 18 BRFL.

#6, 5th ranked THE Ohio State University. Jimbosuke wins the bowl over USC to close out a powerful end of season run.
Starts with 18. 3 for the win, 1 for the no-drop, naught because I don't move up = 22.

#5, 8th ranked Penn State. Seannie G and the Nittanys drop Wash U 35 - 28 to win their bowl.
Starts with 18. 3 for the win, 1 for the no-drop, moves up 1 place in the Poll = 23 BRFL

#4, Miami, the U. SockPuppet started so strong. Alas. Drops the bowl to Wisco, 24 - 34.
Starts with 27. Naught for the win, naught no-drop, and the AP docs you 2 = 25.
We'll always have The Turn-over Chain.

Here's something that's never happened; a tie for the Liberace.

#3, 22nd ranked Boise State.  BroFro and the Broncos, 38 - 28 they win their bowl over Oregon.
Starts with 19. Adds 3 for the win, 1 for the no-drop, AP moves you up 3 = 26 BRFL.
I'd say The Plan worked, Brohime.

#3, 7th ranked Wisconsin. Snottie's Badgers best Miami 34 - 24 for the bowl win.
Start with 24. 3 for the win, no no-drop because, oddly, the AP drops you 1 in the final poll = 26

I  have no idea how we will resolve this Liberace Cock-block.
And now, what you've all been waiting for:

#2, Number 1 ranked Alabama. McLovin'. Bama cruises through the first round crushing the much reviled gnome-faced, cherubic, troll-man mix Dildo Swinny 24 - 6. Then, a tougher time of it, but still, emerges victorious in the Final with the Hawaiin freshman at the helm finishing off Georgia in OT, 26 -23.
Starts with 16. 7 for the curb-stomp of Clemson, 12 for the win over Georgia, a no-drop and he moves up 3 spots in the final poll, that's 23 in the bowl season alone. Ends with 39.

With that amazing finish I was sure he had enough to put him over the top.
But, no.

#1, 11th ranked Notre Dame. DPo pulls off the win over LSU, 21 -17 in the bowl.
Starts with 33, 3 for the bowl win, 1 for the no-drop and the AP moves the Domers up just enough (3) to put Drewpie into the Winner's Circle with 40 BRFL points.

Congrats to the 'Po. Burn in hell, BungFeather.

More stats and $$ figures forthcoming.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

Potentially Shocking BRFL News

Friday, December 15, the post "College Football Playoffs: BRFL Scenarios". I recommend you all take a look at that post, particularly as it pertains to DPo and the Domers closing out the season strong  and earning a significant nut-fondle by the AP.

By my preliminary calculations (and by "preliminary" I mean I have not checked the numbers 5 or 6 times since, if I don't and I get it wrong, you assholes will be all over me like stink) DPo edged McLovin by one point, 40 to 39. McLovin's late season surge fell one point short since he was ranked so high to begin with. While the 'Po chopped his feet hard for extra yardage and churned for that crucial one more BRFL point.

More later.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life

GG, Chapter 13 Results

GG week 13, the Final Chapter.

(#14) Notre Dame 21, (#16) LSU 17. DPo nails the win.
(#3) Georgia outscores Oklahoma (#2)  54-48 in the second ovetime. Plant the flag in your ass, Baker Mayfield.
(#4) Alabama 24 - 6 over Clemson (#1). Burn in hell, Dabo.

Technically we had $220 in the pot. 11 people played, 20 dollars each. I think a few people paid, you know who you are. The rest of you, I need 20 bucks to balance the books, including my 20.

Seannie G, SWEEPage, 5 to go to 74. Third place. You get your $20 back.
Randoo, 1 to get to 50. Stoogatz.
BroFro, 2 to get to 73. Close but no cigar.
'BoSuke, Hello, Mr. SWEEP. 5 to go to 84. 'BoSuke walks away with the Cheese. Winning! $140. (Net 120)
DPo, BOOM, SWEEP. 5 to go to 63. Too little too late.
Bridgenfraulein, 1 to go to 67.
CCS, throws the no-hitter. Zero. Finish with 67.
McLovin. Chyeah!. SWEEP. 5 to finish with 61.
KBronie, 2 to go to 52.
SockPuppet, tries to break the log-jam. Denied. 1 to go to 75. Second place. $60 (30% after deducting Seannie's 20, Sock you net 40)
Snottie, 2 with the semi-strong finish at 52. Meh.

Congratulations to me.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.

GG, Return of the Bowls, Chapter 12 Results

GG Return of the Bowls, Chapter 12.

Wisconsin (#6) opens a can on Miami (#11), 34 - 24. Mark Richt sideline scuffle with officials. Bad sign.
SowCow downs Meechy, 26 - 19. Meechy the only BiG team to lose their bowl game. Sad. Low energy.
UCF (#10) over the Plainsmen (#7), 34 - 27. UCF stays undefeated.

Seannie G, picks up 1 to go to 69.
Randiddle, whiff-whiff-whiff. 0 for 3 equals zero. Stay at 49.
BroFro, 1 to go to 71,
'Bosuke, struggles to get 1, 79 total.
DPo, 1 to move to 58.
Brigin', 1 to 66.
CCS, 1 to climb to 67.
McLovin, 1 to reach 56.
KBronie, naught into naught equals naught. Stay at 50.
SockPuppet, 2 to get to 74. 5 point separation with 'Suke.
Snottie, 1 to crawl to 50.

Jimbosuke,
Commissioner for Life.