GG Week 50, National Championship Results

And finally, it's over. 

The Michigan Wolverines beat the shit out of the University of Washington. 

This one wasn't close. America's team 34, U Wash 13. 

Turns out the invisible man, Donovan Edwards, has been hurt most of the season. Sharon Moore must have been licking his chops waiting to unleash #7 on the unsuspecting Huskies. 6 carries, 104 yards, 2 TDs. He averaged 17.3 yds/carry with a long of 46. 

Washington made some adjustments at the half and managed to stop the bleeding and the gashing from the scUM run game. And then Sharon went to the air and JJ shredded the defense with his legs and this one turned into a snoozer.

 Again it looks like the CFP Final was really the semi-final with Alabama. 

The moral of the story is you don't send a PAC 12 team out against a team that just dispatched Alabama. 

SockPuppet. 3 for the Meechy pick. Ends with 51. 8 points from GG to put toward the BRFL.

Lola. 3. Final is 44. 4 points to the BRFL.

Breaux. 3. Finish with 50. 7 BRFL points.

Timmy! 3. Ends with 43. Maxed out the finish with 11 points in two games. 3 points BRFL.

Snottie. 3 to make 45. 6th place gets 5 BRFL points.

DPo. 3. Finishes the season tied for first with 54. That's 10 BRFL points. Plus his school wins the Natty.

Chiba. 3. Strong finish at 52. Big second half of GG. You get second place, 9 points.

Q. Zero. 28. 12th ( or in this year's case, last) in GG. That Bet the Ranch weekend killed you. No points.

McLovin. 0. Total 39. But you finished tied at #9 in GG so you get 2.

$$uke. 0. Total 39. I'm the turd McLovin tied for 9th. 2 for me.

KBron. 0. Total 30. Nothing for you I'm afraid.

DogTheBountyHunter. 3. End with 34. Good for 10th place. 1 towards your BRFL score.

Ronde'. 0. End with 47. 5th in GG. 6 toward your BRFL total

CCS. 3. Strong finish (54) ties him for Numero Uno in GG. 10 points toward the BRFL score. 

And that's all she wrote for this year's GG contest. Congratulations to DPo and CCS. 

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life

GG Chapter 6, CFP Semi Results

 

Timmy!

Tough picking? You betcha'. But there was one Sweeper.

Tennessee blanks Iowa 35 - 0 in the Cheez-It Bowl. Not a shock. Still, three of us picked Iowa. Why?

America's Team outlasts Alabama 27 - 20 in OT. Michael Penix shows us why he didn't win the Heisman. We are given to believe this will be the last game Nick Saban ever coaches. I'll believe it when I see it. Not sure I understood the call on 4th and three (Milroe into the teeth of the best part of Meechy's outstanding defense) but hey, who am I? I'm just The Commissioner. 

Texas bows to U Washington 31 - 37. SockPuppet feels pain. Fuck you, Quinn Ewers.

SockPuppet. Add 1 to 47 and it's 48 total. 

Lola. 2 to break the 40 barrier. 41 total.

Breaux. 2 to make 47.

Timmy! SWEEP! Remember that this sweep pays 8 GG points. Teebs was sucking, now has 40.

Snottie. 1 to go to 42.

DPo. 2 to go to 51. Strong pull.

Chiba. 1 to go to 49. You're somebody.

Q. Again with the fucking 1. 28.

McLovin. Zero. I don't know what the thought process was here. Let's just say it was bad. 39.

$$uke. 2 to go to 39. Kind of weak.

KBron. 1 to go to 30. Very weak.

DogTBH. 2 to go to 31.

Ronde'. 2 to go to 47. Iowa? Really? What, you didn't want 8 points?

CCS. 2 to go to 51. Gridlock at the top.

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life

GG Chapter 5 Bowlmania Results

Fucking Missouri.

This looked like a lame slate of Bowls but came within 4 point of being a shocker. Read on.

Ohio State's QB1 has a tantrum and enters the portal. The Bucks start QB2 who turns out to have ankles of glass and gets hurt (again). Clueless Ohio State coaching staffers leave him in there, like a wounded animal, so he can take a few more bone shattering hits, then they replace him with a petrified true freshman who has apparently been in South America all season. Just for kicks the TOSU staff benches their center and shuffles an already terrible O-line to maximize penalties, turnstile sacks and turnovers. Missouri blitzes all eleven, on every play and TOSU doesn't adjust.

Missouri curbstomps the Bucks 14 - 3 in a snoozer Cotton Bowl. McLovin on suicide watch.

Ole Miss makes Penn State look pedestrian, 38 - 25. Big-game James Franklin douches another one.

People (people like Snottie) derided The Commissioner when he put up the Wisconsin - LSU game. Everybody but brain-damaged Ronde' picked LSU. But it turned out to be the best game of the three, so fuck you, Snottie.

LSU 35 - Wisconsin Badgers 31.

SockPuppet. 1 to go to 47. Costly wager on B1G Ten teams.

Lola. 1 to go to 39. That won't get it done. 

BreauxFreaux. 1 to go to 45. Oops. 

Timmy! Add one to go to 32. Somewhere a gas station attendant is making fun of you.

Snottie. Oh, Gee. You got 1. wow. 41.

DPo. SWEEP! Add 5 to go to 49. Holy shit. The Po with the timely move.

Chiba. 2 to make 48. Respectable.

Q. SWEEP! Sweet redemption for the riverboat gambler. Add 5 to make 27.

McLovin. 2 to get 39. Homer TOSU pick costs him the SWEEP.

$$uke. 2 to go to 37. Samesies as McLovin on the TOSU gambit.

KBron. 2 to go to 29.

DTBH. 2 to make 29. Q has almost as many as you and she bet the ranch. You call yourself a man?!

Ronde'. 1 to go to 45. I assume you don't want to win.

CCS. 2 to go to 49. Penn State? Really? You're usually paying attention. Odd. 

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life

GG Bowls Chapter 4. Arizona Week.

 Here, this batch of bowls, we started to see some serious separation. 5 Sweeps.

Arizona cock-stomps Oklahoma, 38 - 24. Good luck in the SEC, Okies. 

Clemson nips Kentucky, 38 - 35. And absolutely nobody gives a shit.

Notre Dame just fucking clubs the Beavers to DEATH, 40 - 8. Thanks for imploding on $$uke, Beavs. QB transfers and opts out, All-World RB gets a DUI and sits and the coach bolts for Meechy State. Shit happens. 

Sock. SWEEP! 5 to reach 46. Looking unstoppable. 

Lola. Picks up the deuce, goes to 38.

Breaux. SWEEP! (that's six games straight for the Breaux). 5 to go to 44. 

Timmy! 2 to go to 31. Losing altitude?

Snottie. SWEEP! 5 to go to 40. Still a factor. 

DPo. 2 to go to 44. Threatening.

Chiba. SWEEP! 5 to go to, wait, what?! 46.

Q. This is really a bad situation. 1 to go to 22. Have to remember she bet the ranch earlier. 

McLovin. 1 to go to 37. Not bad. Not great. 

$$uke. 2 to make 35. Meh. Not good.

Kbron. Zero. 27. 😆😆😆

DTBH. Zero. 27. 😴

Ronde'. 1 to go to 44. Would have been better to have picked more than one correctly. 

CCS. SWEEP! 5 to go to 47. 'Unstoppable' my ass. CCS in the lead. 

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life

GG Bowls Chapter 3 Results

Challenging set of Bowls.

One Sweeper.

The Golden Gophers of Minnesota dump Bowling Green 30 - 24. This surprised me. This also pissed me off, since I had Bowling Green.

Oklahoma State takes the Poke-Sticks to Texas A&M, 31 - 23. Is there a more hapless, dumb-fuck program than TAMU right now? Dunno! I'm just the Commissioner.

Rutgers lays wood to Miami, 31 - 24. Remember when Miami was 'Da U' and won games? Me neither.

SockPuppet. 1 to go to 41. Anemic.

Lola. 2 to go to 36.

Breaux. SWEEP! 5 takes the Breaux to 39. Shut out on the last set of Bowls, now he's the only Sweeper. 

Timmy! Only 1. Timmy! at 29.

Snottie. 2 for Snottie adds up to 35. Respectable. Not great.

DPo. Costly slip up as he goes oh for three and stays at 42. 

Chiba. 2 to make 41.

Q. Grabs 2 but only reaches 21. So very sad.

McLovin. 2 to go to 36.

$$uke. 2 to go to 33. Bad.

KBron. 1 to go to 27. Worse.

DTBH. 2 to go to 27. Ugh.

Ronde'. Opportunity knocks but you only get 1. 43 Total.

CCS. Adds 2 to reach 42.

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life

GG Bowlarama Results, Chapter 2

This one was a tough one to pick.

We had one Sweeper.

USF Bulls spit-roasted Syracuse 45 - 0.

Th NIU Huskies edged the Arkansas State Red Eyes 21 - 19.

Georgia State gutted Utah State 45 - 22. This one was the Sweep Buster.

Sock. 38 plus 2 to make 40.

Lola. 32 and 2 for 34.

BreauxFreaux. Naught into naught equals naught. Stay at 34. 

Timmy! 2 to go to 28.

Snottie. Gets 1. 33.

DPo. 2 to go to 42. Here's where the Po started making his move.

Chiba. 1 to make 39. Not impressive...yet.

Q. 2 to go to 19. Still can't break that stubborn 20 barrier.

McLovin. Big old zero on the week. 34.

$$uke. 2 to make 31.

KBron. 1 to get to 26.

DogTHEBountyHunter. SWEEP! 5 to make 25. The only Sweeper, as mentioned.

Ronde'. 2 to g to 42.

CCS. Grabs a deuce to get to 40.

And we kept rolling.

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life.

Week 50. National Championship.

 Washington Huskies vs America's Team

Monday night. Worth 3 GG points if you nail it.

Roll the bone, Bitches.

Lance Herbstrong

Commissioner for Life.