NCAA's Last Gleaming?

I don’t want to talk about this. But I think you have to see it, so… here it is. Warning: it’s slightly Not Safe For Breakfast.

(H/T @LandGrant33, and by H/T I mean Y U HATE MY EYES?)

Bucknuts. That is all.

Car washings is serious business

NCAA rules are dumb. But until now, we didn’t know just how dumb:

Yup, a University had to report a secondary violation because an athlete washed her carwith University water. According to Lost Lettermen, the full story is about as dumb as you would expect:

A WCC school self-reported an extra benefits violation to the NCAA when university officials caught one of their women’s golfers washing her car on campus, according to the source. The NCAA ruled a secondary violation had occurred because the water was not available to regular students and demanded the golfer pay back $20, which was deemed to be the value of the water and use of the hose.”

It was a violation because the USE OF A HOSE WAS AN IMPERMISSIBLE BENEFIT. And she had to PAY $20 because the hose wasn’t available to the general student body. In other words, this thing that is generally unavailable to the general student body is fine:

Ross Academic Center

And this will lead us slouching to SMU:

Hose

Once again, fine:

Suspect:

Save us Obi-Wan KenO’Bannon. You’re our only hope.

(NOTE: the second violation, while less funny, is probably worse. How can someone make some kind of impermissible contact with a recruit when he doesn’t  know who he is talking to? We lawyer types call that “mens rea.” Everyone else calls it “holy itchy Gold Bond balls, use some common sense you ridiculous tools”)